Born in Amsterdam in 1936, just around the corner from where she lives today, Maria Catharina de Jager-Alderding has spent nine decades navigating the same beloved city, from the darkest chapters of the 20th century to the vibrant present she still embraces with open arms.
Maria was a child when Nazi forces occupied the Netherlands. She watched her mother walk twelve hours a day to neighboring towns just to bring food home. German soldiers paraded the streets with guns, and over time, the terror became a grim normality. The family survived on sugar beets and, when desperation set in, even on dog meat.
To keep warm through the brutal winters, they dismantled their own home for firewood until the structure gave way, and the collapse took the life of one of her brothers. She still carries the memory of Jewish neighbors being led away. But Maria prefers to dwell in the now.
At 16, she met the man she would marry, finding him on the dance floor, the place she has always felt most alive. They wed in 1955, when she was 19, and by 20 she was a mother to her first son, Eddy, now 70. A second son followed, now 68. Together, the family grew into four grandchildren and eight great-grandchildren, who remain the joy of her life. Her sons visit nearly every Wednesday to share a meal with her, providing for a quiet, steady ritual that has held for decades.
Her husband was, by her account, a good man. He was a devoted father who took care of the family. Then, at 53, he suffered a stroke that left him unable to speak and paralyzed on his right side. Without hesitation, Maria became his full-time caregiver. She never once considered placing him in a home.
She cared for him for thirty years, sustaining them both with her humor and her inexhaustible love of conversation. When he began drawing coffins, silently expressing his wish to die, she would joke that he should jump in the canal and somehow, it worked. He stopped drawing coffins. He passed away in 2016. For her extraordinary dedication, Maria was awarded the Order of Oranje-Nassau by the Queen of the Netherlands.
For 42 years, Maria has volunteered at de Klinker, a local assisted living facility. Though she is technically a client there, she sees herself simply as a volunteer. She organizes and hosts the monthly bingo night, gets her hair done there every Wednesday, and fills every room she enters with conversation and warmth. She danced for years until a hip replacement finally slowed her feet, though never her spirit.
How old are you and how old do you feel?
"I feel exactly the same as I did when I was 65, and my brain still works so well, I don't feel like 90 at all."
What helps you maintain your physical, mental, and social well-being?
"I feel so young because I know everyone, I talk a lot, and I dive in headfirst to things. I am an organizer and I chat with everyone. I always ask questions. I am a social butterfly, it's something you cannot learn. It's given to you at birth. When I walk into de Klinker, there are so many people of different ages and places, and I talk to them and ask them questions. So many things have happened in my life, my mom left the family when I was young, I lived through a war, I had to take care of my husband and so I learned how to keep on going."
What advice do you have for aging well?
"Ask questions, chat to everyone, help others and don't be racist, because everyone is equal and you have to talk to everyone equally. I notice that many older people are racist and it makes you old and bitter. You have to stay positive."
Life expectancy 2023
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